Another copy/paste for those who "love" my copy/pastes
It was that time of year again, when the president goes for his checkup. The presidential medical team did a battery of tests. The president's heart was in good shape. His cholesterol count was within an acceptable range. Blood pressure was A-okay. No trouble on the prostate front.
All that remained was a trip to the White House optometrist.
"Good day, Mr. President," the optometrist said.
"Hey, Four Eyes," said the president, who has a nickname for everyone.
"Have a seat here," said the doctor. "I'm going to project some things on the wall and I just want you to read them for me."
"Okey doke," said the president.
"Now, we don't usually start with the top line, that's a bit too easy, but why don't you read me those letters on the third row."
"Okay," said the president. "Let's see. That's A, E, Y, P, Q, R."
The doctor frowned. The letters displayed on the wall were O, D, A, N, P, U.
"Uh, I said the third row, Mr. President. You want to just try those again?"
"Sure, A, E, Y, P, Q, R."
The optometrist decided to go to a row where the letters were larger. "Why don't you go up one, and read me the second row." On the chart were the letters H, B, C, X, S.
The president said, "Z, Q, E, I, V."
Whoa. "Read the top line," the eye doctor said. The top line consisted of only one letter, E. The president said: "S."
The optometrist had never seen anything like this. According to this, the president was virtually blind. But didn't the commander-in-chief walk into the office unaided? Sure he did. Did he bump into anything? No.
The optometrist decided to try something a bit different. "I'm going to project some sentences from various newspapers up on to the wall, Mr. President, and you try to read them to me."
"Whatever you say, Four Eyes."
The optometrist slipped a news article into the projection machine, and suddenly, on the wall in front of the president were the words: "More than a thousand U.S. soldiers have died in Iraq and the casualties continue to mount."
"Can you read that, Mr. President?"
"Sure. It says, `Freedom is on the march.' "
The doctor said, "Interesting. Let's try another one." On the wall appeared the words: "Even some leading Republicans are now saying that the war in Iraq was ill-conceived and don't see a way out of it."
"Uh," said the president, "it says, `We are making the world safe by bringing democracy to Iraq right on schedule.' Although that last word, I think the last `e' is missing. Must be a typo."
"Let's try one more," the eye doctor said, and slipped another article into the projection machine. "Can you read this to me?"
" `Mission accomplished,' " said the president.
The doctor looked at the words on the wall. They were a headline that read: "Iraq: the new Vietnam?"
Now the doctor wanted to go through the same test again. The president read each phrase just as he had the first time, except with even more conviction. So the optometrist had him do it a third time. This time, the president offered up the same readings, but spoke with even greater authority.
The president spoke with such confidence, that the doctor was starting to wonder if maybe it wasn't the president who had the problem, but him.
"I'm going to give you a clean bill of health here," the optometrist said, sending the president on his way.
And then the eye doctor got into the chair the president had been sitting in, and looked at the big E projected against the wall, and slowly, he began to nod.
"It IS an S," he said quietly to himself. "Why did I never see that before?"
From Toronto Star.
All that remained was a trip to the White House optometrist.
"Good day, Mr. President," the optometrist said.
"Hey, Four Eyes," said the president, who has a nickname for everyone.
"Have a seat here," said the doctor. "I'm going to project some things on the wall and I just want you to read them for me."
"Okey doke," said the president.
"Now, we don't usually start with the top line, that's a bit too easy, but why don't you read me those letters on the third row."
"Okay," said the president. "Let's see. That's A, E, Y, P, Q, R."
The doctor frowned. The letters displayed on the wall were O, D, A, N, P, U.
"Uh, I said the third row, Mr. President. You want to just try those again?"
"Sure, A, E, Y, P, Q, R."
The optometrist decided to go to a row where the letters were larger. "Why don't you go up one, and read me the second row." On the chart were the letters H, B, C, X, S.
The president said, "Z, Q, E, I, V."
Whoa. "Read the top line," the eye doctor said. The top line consisted of only one letter, E. The president said: "S."
The optometrist had never seen anything like this. According to this, the president was virtually blind. But didn't the commander-in-chief walk into the office unaided? Sure he did. Did he bump into anything? No.
The optometrist decided to try something a bit different. "I'm going to project some sentences from various newspapers up on to the wall, Mr. President, and you try to read them to me."
"Whatever you say, Four Eyes."
The optometrist slipped a news article into the projection machine, and suddenly, on the wall in front of the president were the words: "More than a thousand U.S. soldiers have died in Iraq and the casualties continue to mount."
"Can you read that, Mr. President?"
"Sure. It says, `Freedom is on the march.' "
The doctor said, "Interesting. Let's try another one." On the wall appeared the words: "Even some leading Republicans are now saying that the war in Iraq was ill-conceived and don't see a way out of it."
"Uh," said the president, "it says, `We are making the world safe by bringing democracy to Iraq right on schedule.' Although that last word, I think the last `e' is missing. Must be a typo."
"Let's try one more," the eye doctor said, and slipped another article into the projection machine. "Can you read this to me?"
" `Mission accomplished,' " said the president.
The doctor looked at the words on the wall. They were a headline that read: "Iraq: the new Vietnam?"
Now the doctor wanted to go through the same test again. The president read each phrase just as he had the first time, except with even more conviction. So the optometrist had him do it a third time. This time, the president offered up the same readings, but spoke with even greater authority.
The president spoke with such confidence, that the doctor was starting to wonder if maybe it wasn't the president who had the problem, but him.
"I'm going to give you a clean bill of health here," the optometrist said, sending the president on his way.
And then the eye doctor got into the chair the president had been sitting in, and looked at the big E projected against the wall, and slowly, he began to nod.
"It IS an S," he said quietly to himself. "Why did I never see that before?"
From Toronto Star.
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